Work anecdotes. :)

Customer: "halp my server is down reboot it plz"
Rilgon: "I doubt that."

rilgon@stabilizedeffortserver$ ssh -l root [customer's IP]
[enters password]
root@customerserver#

Rilgon: "..."

root@customerserver# shutdown -r now
(Or the alternative - mstsc /v [customer's IP] /console)


Customer: "i get email from monitoring service about high load plz fix server tks"
Rilgon: "I'll see what I can do."

*logs onto customer server*
*runs top*

Rilgon: "gee, the fact that your apache processes are going haywire could cause it"

*restarts apache*

*load goes back to level it was pre-restart*

Rilgon: "...or your website is getting hammered harder than BigRedKitty after releasing a new video..."

*informs customer*

Customer: "u no fix fix plz tks"
Rilgon: *headdesk*